do we dip our toes in?

I have recently been very challenged about everything i do and how much i put into it.

I have been out of action over the weekend due to a minor op, and this has coincided with Laura deciding that we are going to redecorate the lounge. Now for me this has been quite good timing, as i am not very good at decorating, and i tend to cut a lot of corners, and it ends up looking worse than it did before.

While i have been out of action i have put our V+ box to work and while the rest of the family scuttled off to church on Sunday morning, i started to watch a soul surviour programme that i had recorded. It had the very funny J.John spaeking about commitment and how people like to dabble in something but not really jump in with both feet. There is a fear of committing to anything.

Working with young people I see that a lot, and in a way that doesn't bother me because we all tried to get away with things when we were younger. What worries me is that us adults don't seem to have grown out of the problem. A few years ago i worked with someone, that when you asked them if they wanted to do something, or plan something they would say " I'll let you know" or "we'll see" .

On the bus journey into work today i got chatting to a woman next to me and we were chatting about our kids, and she kept refering ot her other half as 'her partner'. Even in reltionships we are sceptical about getting let down or hurt, so our defense shields say ' I will keep things at an arms length.'

Now .... i suppose this could all sound logical, even to me, if people get hurt, people get trod on and things kept going wrong. What i can't get my head round is when people who claim to be Christians do the same with God. You see for me, this is the one relationship where i know i will be safe, i know I won't get let down, and yet i still, sometimes keep Him at arms length. I don't totally hand my life over to Him. Why? Because sometimes we let our nervousness that we have of people, affect our relationship with Jesus.

This doesn't make me less loved by Jesus, it doesn't mean i am a rubbish Christian, it just means i am not getting everything i can out of life and, more importantly, I am not getting everything God wants to give me. And with this in mind i think how is this going to affect 'The Church' ? because if we don't have everything God wants to give us how can we pass it on.

So the question i have is ...... do i keep dipping my toes in or am i going to get soaked?